i was having dinner with qq at out of the pan this evening. [she has casually agreed to be another of my meantime girls] she treated me cos she knew i was sad and broke and food, especially waffle, would cheer me up. it did indeed but not enough to make me happy. i was already on the train back to hall but i kept thinking about her. i knew if i didn't at least try to see her today, i'd have a disturbed night ahead. so i changed the train at outram and headed to her place.
i rang the bell.
she answered the bell through the speaker phone system, "hello"
"pocky"
"she's not in" and hung up. it was obviously her voice.
i rang the bell a few more times and she didn't answer so i went back hall.
abstinence is bad. the whole day i tried not to think of her and it was so torturing. when i was on train and tried hard not to be tempted to go to her place, i was suffering. but after i went to see her, even i got rejected, even i didn't see her, i felt much better. at least i did what i wanted to do. at least i tried.
my parents called me just now. i think my father could tell from my voice that i'm sad. he asked what was wrong despite the fact that i told him a few times that i was fine. so i told him i quarrelled with pokido. he sounded sympathetic and passed the phone to my mother. she sounded sad, as if she wanted to help but too helpless. so she asked me to forget about it and go back to thailand. well, maybe i really need a break from singapore.
on a less sad note: cody went to HK and bought a DVD that i mentioned to him before that i wanted to watch (but it is banned in singapore) for me as a souvenir. i don't know the title of the movie but i know Daniel Wu acted as a gay in this show. muahahaha... maybe i should start recruiting meantime boys too!
Ni submitted homework at 12:12 AM
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